The drama of the MP3

OK, so I have finally ordered, recieved and managed to work my MP3 player.

Let me explain.

Last night me and Ineke sat down to order my beloved MP3 player, super duper fantastic. The order has gone through.. or so we thought. Ineke then rang the help desk who informed us that the supposedly next day delivery wont actually happen therefore i have the option of collecting it from the shop or waiting for its delivery. What he failed to mention was that actually i couldnt collect it from the shop as my delivery will come from a different location. However, after the 40 minute journey to the shop the bloke said he was able to cancel mny order, refund the money to the card and start again. So, i did come home with the MP3, after paying twice.

Aftre arriving home, me and Robbert successfully uploaded the required software, plugged in the usb cable to find it didnt work. I tried everything. I called the help desk 3 times, reset the player, downloaded some other stuff from the website and tried again. Failed and went back to the shop.

After the bloke behind the counter had finished uploading the software to his computer he enlightened me that actually it is working for him therefore it is my computer not the player..

I then went home, tried everything i could think of, to finbd the installation disk had been left at the shop.. Fan bloody tastic.

Back to the shop i go..

Arrived home safely and have managed to get my mp3 player to work on Inekes laptop.

MP3 is now charged. Songs are on other computer. Lovely.

MP3 Player. No music.

Bit of a Bummer!

Please excuse the punned title!

Let me set the scene for you..

It is a beautiful day in the Heart of Rotterdam.

A young lady, feeling rather summery dressed in a 3/4 length white skirt, top and white jacket mounts her bike to share lunch with her boyfriend.

Whilst on her journey she encounters a problem.

After trying to pull her skirt up at the back she realises her butt is exposed to the world. Yes. The zip has infact broken. Still clipped at the top but leaving a rather revealing naked strip down the middle of her arse.

In this poor girls state of shock she cycles in to the curb, almost toppling over, gains her balance (butt cheeks still on full display) stands up and immediatly backs against the nearest wall. After a few seconds of bright red cheeks (HaHa, which cheeks?) and intence laughter a 50 something gentleman asks me (sorry.. the young lady involved..) what is wrong and if there is anything he can do to help. The situation is then explained followed by the 'do you happen to have a safety pin' question. After this kind gentlemans rummage through his van he continues his search in the long row of offices she has backed up against.

After a long wait the gentleman re-appears with a paper clip. A paper clip I tell you!! What the frig was she suppose to do with a paper clip!!

Anyway, so the lovely young lady tries out this over sized paper clip, only to get it caught in her underwear at which point the kind man offers to help her untangle it!!!! Well!!!

After disconnecting the paper clip from her underwear she continues on her journey to meet her boyfriend (who may i add found the whole situation rather ammusing.)

They then went to his place of work to sort the problem. Unsuccessfully.

After much diliberation the young lady decides to just tie her jacket around her waste and have a look around the town.

Just when she thought it was over, her flip flop broke.

Leaving this poor individual to walk around exposing not only her butt to the world but also her bare feet..

The agonising, bare-footed walk back to her boyfriends work was topped by the wedge of glass dug deep into the heel of her foot. Once removed she continued her journey (cycling home bare-footed, needless to say) to arrive safely at her place of rest.

Yes, incase you were wondering, I am the young lady in the story.

These things can only happen to me.

Monday Monday..

OK, so although i am still not 100% sure why Mondays where invented, mine seem to be getting better. I woke up around 7.30, was a huge struggle but the thought of being able to make it back to my bed within the hour was satisfying enough to get me up in the first place. Went downstairs, sorted lunches and breakfast and off i went back up to bed. Infact, i slept until 12.30. A very welcomed sleep.

After getting up, making myself look at least half presentable, doing a wash load and conquering a few shirts that needed to be ironed i left the house to get the kids from school.

Now, as i have told you before, Mondays are Judo days. So after the usual routine of getting home from the school, going through the whole 'mag ik televisie kijken' 'nee! het weer is heel leuk! buiten spele!!' (ok so my Dutch isnt all that good, i am pretty sure i am going to be corrected on that one..) eventually giving in and letting them watch tele for a few minutes whilst i get the bikes out of the shed.. only to find Timo's is missing.. bugger its still at the school from Friday.. OK, its only 3.20, we have five minutes before we have to leave..

'schoenen en jas aan alsjeblieft!!' so we ran over to the school, Caroline trapsing behind, grab the bike, run back, load the buggy to the back of my bike and off we go to Judo.

So that was that, how fantastic.

Anyway, Monday evening i went over to the office to do some cleaning, to break up the evening i had a visitor, 5 infact. 5 14 year old boys. One of which had dropped a top off the balcony upstairs and wanted it back from the office garden (the cat has just done a really smelly poo in the litter behind me.. blimey it stinks!) anyway, once these kids find out i am English, they obviously want to stay and chat,

'can we come and watch you work'

'No'

'do you fancy my friend? he wants you to be his girlfriend'

'sorry, i think you may be a little young'

'i may be young but my **** is mature for my age..'

'at which point i say my goodbyes and close the door'

Bought a little amusement to my evening anyway!!

Once the office was all spangly clean i went to Coconuts, yes, at about half past 8, jack didnt finish until 11.30, leaving me in the company of jerome, nermin and the security guy. Was a very funny evening, and they laughed at my blimin hilarious joke that nobody else found funny. i would enlighten you on it but its in Dutch and doesnt make sence if translated to English, sorry guys.

So, that was my monday, fantabulostic.

The Burger Beater

Last night i met up with Kathrin, we met at five PM outside Centraal Station. We hit it off straight away (well at least, i think we did, maybe she would have a different view!!!) and went to the American Dreamz cafe.

I ate the Nachos (obviously) and Kathrin had an egg roll. As we were finishing up a group of American 40 somethings came in. Now, in this cafe you can buy a burger for 45 euros (only!!) which weighs 1250g. Now, if you eat this burger, along with all the crap that goes with it in under half an hour then you get your money back plus the chance to win a holiday in Florida. Not bad hé! (oh.. did i forget to mention that last year only two people managed to accomplish this?) Anyway, so we spent the next 20 minutes trying to persuade them to do it, failed miserable, got invited to sit with them and drank for free the rest of the evening!!

Winner!!

Ouch! My Butt hurts!!

Yes, it is official. Yesterday morning at approximately 7.30 I fell down the stairs.

Blimin well hurt.

I am currently struggling to sit on my right bum cheek and cannot move my neck more than 40 degrees without calling for help.

Men

Now, before I start this post I want to make it clear that I am not sexist. This is in no way a sexist post and therefor the content does not apply to all men. However, I would also like to add that what I am about to write would not have occured if I was a Man and the bloke involved was a woman. Woman do not do / say this sort of thing. So, I guess, that does make me a little sexist, on this topic anyway.

Saturday Evening on the Metro

As you know, Saturday evening I went into Rotterdam for mine and Jacks St Patricks Day celebration. As it happens, Jack was working so I had to make my own way into town to meet him.

So, all is good, I got the bus from Ridderkerk to Zuidplien, waited patiently for the Metro and got on.

All is still good, until I notice a group of lads leering over in my direction and muttering amongst themselves. Now I am in no way boostfull of the fact they were looking at me, infact I really wish they weren't. Anyway so they all got off the metro, all except one, who decided to come and sit opposite me. OK, so apart from the eyes trying to burn holes in me he wasn't doing anything wrong. Until a friend of his comes onboard too, sits next to him and starts the muttering all over again. By this time I am starting to get quite angry but chose not to say anything.. until he starts to talk to me that is.

To start with, I just ignored him, but he was persistant, so I told him I dont speak dutch and turned away (hoping this would shut him up.. oh how wrong was I) So he continues to tell me his English is good and asks if he can sit next to me.

The conversation went something like this..

"Can I sit next to you"

"No"

"Where are you going?"

"Whats it to you?"

"Well, I'm coming with you"

"No, I really don't think you are"

"Yes, I am, Tell me where your going"

At this point the Metro arrives at Stadhuis, my stop, so I get up to walk to the door. He walks with me, stands right up against me and continues to talk.

"Tell me where you are going, I am coming too, I like English girls"

"Can you please just step away from me?"

"Why? What is wrong?"
"Look, I asked you to leave me alone, now will you please just do that?"

"I am coming out with you"

"Just F**k off and leave me alone!" (Sorry Mum)

At this point the doors open to the station, me presuming I am OK now, until he starts to walk off the Metro with me and follow towards the escalators, By this point I am quite convinced that actually, he is coming with me. Until he turns back towards the Metro that is. Phew! That was a tad scary.

OK, I have a question. Why is it that people (I am careful to use the word 'people' and not 'men') think it is OK to invade someones privacy and personal space like that? I want to make it clear that I was not dressed like a hooker, and even if I was, they still do not have the right to talk to me the way they did. Nothing they said was particularly suggestive or aggressive. However, it was intimidating.

You know, there is nothing wrong with talking to a girl, even chatting her up, but No means No right? No matter what the question? But hang on, sorry, there was no question! "would you mind if we joined you this evening" is close to acceptable, but ''I am coming with you'' I would say is a little threatening? Agree?

Post in a Post in a Post

OK, so i have been slaking a little lately when i comes to my blog.. So heres the lengthy post to update you on the Wonderful World of Rachel.

Lets start with Thursday.

Hannibal Rising

Thursday Evening me and Jack went to see this very fantastic film. Now I love the thrill of watching a horror but am very easily scared. However, this was not so bad. The film in itself was incredibly good, the story behind why Hannibal Lectar became who he did, it is actually quite sad!

Anyway, What I found far more disturbing than the film itself was the fact that I got asked for I.D. Please could someone explain to me what that is all about!! I know I look young for my age but i am 19 next month!! The film is a 16!! Anyway, I am sure I will be more than happy about this when i reach 30 and am still getting I.D'd to enter a club. Wahoo for me.

St Patricks Day

This is a day I have never ever celebrated, haven't the foggiest who the ever-so-famous St Patrick is, however, seen as I am no longer a resident of one of the 4 places that make up the UK i felt it my duty to represent Ireland (OK, so i am not technically Irish, in fact i am no way Irish.. but work with me..) So me and Jack made ourselves look pretty and paid O'Sheas Irish bar a visit. It. Was. Packed. However it was well worth it just to hear some English voices. So that was saturday night. How fantastic.

Church

Now, i haven't been to church since leaving England. And really haven't been looking. However, Austin is leaving next Sunday and asked if i would go along with him to the Sunday morning English service he attends at the Beurs World Trade Centre. So i did. Along with 7 others. Yes, just seven. And 6 of those 7 were Dutch!! However, I enjoyed it. Everyone was really nice and welcoming. Infact, i went to lunch with Austin and 2 others. Very nice, had a spicy chicken wrap. Super.

I then spent the remainder of my Sunday sitting around Coconuts, eating, drinking and reading.

Lovely Jubely.

So i guess thats my update, not so exciting after all.

High speed chase..

..Well, not exactly.

Me and Jack were walking through Zuidplein Metro station when some guy in a white bommer jacket starts talking to me. Well, to be fair I think it looked very much like he was selling something (considering he had Chipkaart stamped all over his back, one would naturally presume they were advertising, well.. erm.. chipkaarts). Anyway, so I looked at him, stated that I don't speak Dutch and hurried on my way.

Oh.. its not over yet.. So me and Jack are very innocently waiting on the platform when 2 guys (in the white Chipkaart bommer jackets) turn up along with the 'Metro Police'

So they ramble on at Jack in Dutch, insist that He show them our strippenkaart to prove we have paid and then start rambling at me. (At this point I really have no idea what he is talking about and just pressume he is doing a routine check of all tickets.) Anyway, so Jack informs them that I am English and therefore do not speak Dutch. Too which the 'Metro Police' guy completely ignores. So I very innocently look straight at him , carefully pronouncing every letter and repeat what Jack had said previously (in English, of course) I DO NOT SPEAK DUTCH THEREFORE HAVE NO IDEA WHAT YOU ARE TALKING ABOUT. Well at this he looked quite taken aback and continued on his merry way.

Well as it happens. The guy I mentioned earlier (the one in the white bommer jacket who I thought was trying to sell me something) actually happened to be a ticket inspector who of which I blatantly ignored and turned my back on. Him, therefore presuming we haven't paid, leading to the (not-so) high speed chase on the platform.

Leading me to my next point of people who blatantly ignore the obviouse. When I state that I do not speak or understand Dutch, I do not say this for the pure humour of the situation. It is, in fact, true. So please, please, if I ever come across you in the street and you proceed to talk to me in your mother tongue, after realising I do not understand you, do not continue to talk.

P.s. the guy at the metro station was not the only person to do this, it seems to be a habit of a select few.

The case of the missing key

I'm sorry, i do not care what anyone says, i am not an irresponsible person. I look after my belongings and take care in what i do.

Let me explain my sequence of events. Maybe you are able to pick up on the moments when i could have in fact miss-layed my key. Bike key that is.

Tuesday was the last time i used my bike. I cycled into town (accompanied by my key) . Dismounted my Bike, locked it up and went to H&M followed by the post office. Unlocked my bike (therefore i must have still had my key by this point) Remounted my bike and cycled home. Now, when i unlock my bike i slip the key back into my coat pocket. Every time. Without fail. So why, may i ask, when i slip my coat on this evening, retrieve my bike from the garden shed and wheel it into the house, do i place my hand in my pocket to find an empty one? No, i don't know either.

Any suggestions?

Yesterday was Monday, Today is Wet

OK, so mondays aren't my favourite day. However this one wasn't so bad, well from 3 '0' clock onwards anyway. Before 3pm was bad. To start with the computer was acting up and I had to keep reloading it to get the internet up and running. Then I watched half a film. Yes, just half because some silly numpty decided to only upload half of 'The Devil Wears Prada' onto peekvid. How annoying. Then my Mum called. Now this wasn't a bad thing of course, but it triggered a lot of emotions and I cried the whole time. Delightful.

OK, so 3 'o' clock arrives and I pick up the children from school, heave the bikes from the back to the front of the house and make our way to Judo. Now, I have to say, this went very well. The boys were so good and stuck with me the whole time. So Caroline and Time Judoed (again, is this a word?) whilst Morten played outside and very unconvincingly told me that he couldn't Judo as his back was hurting too much (kinda hard to believe whilst he's hanging upside down from a monkey bar). However, I didn't want to be responsible for any broken bones so we cycled straight home, had an early dinner and headed over to the office for a spot of spring cleaning. And that was my Monday. Really not so bad afterall. Still i am pleased Monday only comes once a week.

So today is Tuesday. Oh how I hate the rain. Today I cycled in Rotterdam to meet Jack from the Metro, what a lovely surprise. I then headed over to the Library to buy my Rotterdam pas. I was number 55 from the ticket machine. They were on 23. I waited for just under an hour in a room full of Dutch people. So when it gets to number 53 I start to get a little excited, close my book and stand up. Oh no, lets not be hasty. The little number machine skips from 53 to 56!! whats up with that!! So I had to wait an extra 15 minutes!! was not ammused to say the least. So I get to the front desk to be faced by a rather large librarian telling me that I was jumping the queue!! well, I soon put her straight.

And that was my day so far.

Off to collect the kids from school, head to swimming and return home for a rather cosy night in.

Tot Ziens!

Feeling a little fragile AKA Hungover

Sorry Mum.

Me and Jack have had a few little fall outs recently so sat down for a talk last night. Enough said on that subject. However this talk led to the very mature decision to go out and get very very drunk.

Now, I haven't had a proper drinking sesh since October when I got ridiculously drunk and threw up my insides all over the bus. Last night wasn't quite that bad. To be honest, I think it was just what we needed, to spend some proper time together just having fun. We started off at the American Dream bar, opening our evening with a (very over-expensive) smirnoff ice and a few beers, not to mention the amzingly generous portion of nachos. After this we of course headed to Coconuts, an ideal place for us to get sloshed, considering we drink for free. After drinking numerous amounts of shots, coctails and spirits we decided to take to the Ice. Yes. Once placing a pair of Ice Skates on your feet you begin to realise how much alcohol you have actually consumed. Anyway, after about 10 minutes on the ice, a fantastic tumble, fall and slide from Jack and the return of our shoes we headed back into Coconuts.

When we first arrived at Coconuts we sat next to a Northern Irish couple at the bar, turns out the lady (didn't catch her name) was a nanny in London and her husband designed film sets!! How cool is that!! Well, this couple became good friends of ours over the course of the evening, of course, never to see them again.

So that brings me to the title of this post. I am feeling incredibly fragile and in desperate need of an English breakfast. Which i am infact going to find now.

My Weekend

Day One of my Weekend (well, that's if you include Friday as part of the weekend, which in fact i do, therefore making the week almost the same length as the weekend.)

This morning Ineke had to leave for work at stoopid '0' clock so I had to take care of the kids breakfast and trip to school. Breakfast was actually surprisingly fun. We made our own little band. Timo on Guitar, Morten on Drums, Caroline on Vocals, and me, well I was band manager of course!! So that was breakfast (well, of course we ate some delicious (lets take advantage cos mum's not here) naughty foods) and then headed off to school.. well half way anyway before Morten and Timo very rightly point out to me that we have in fact forgotten Rucksacks. So after the mad rush back to the house we head back to the school for a quick story with Timo (yes in Dutch, so really we just flicked through the pictures) a made rush to get Caroline changed for Gym class and a short walk back to the house.

Jack then came over for lunch, a sausage roll to be precise, and went off to work whilst I did the washing etc.

After picking the kids up from school Morten, Caroline and I went off to the park (Timo stayed home as he didn't want to go out in the cold, Robbert was also home may I just add.. didn't just leave the poor kid by himself..) So Morten lead the way.. very successfully to a park that wasn't open, so we ran back towards the house and got the bus into town. Now, I have to tell you that we went to a really fantastic park!! They had swings and slides (like any other basic place) but on top of that they had rope swings and tires and footballs and sand pits and round abouts and loads of other stuff that I cant explain!! Was soo much fun!!

Jack then finished work extra early so I went off into town about 7.30ish, met Jack for a drink and came back to mine to watch a film and go to sleep.. We watched 'The Hours' A very intriguing film. But worth watching.

Day Two (this being Saturday)

Me and Jack had a lazy morning, just watching T.V and stuff, until Jamie (Ineke and Robberts previous aupair) turned up!! To cut a long story short, Jamie was working at an Art Gallery in Rotterdam but could no longer stay with the people she was staying with.. lets just say the 63 year old man took a slight liking to her.

Jack and I then went into town for a spot of shopping, he went to work, I went back to Inekes for food, watched a bit of Tele with Jamie and went back out to Coconuts. I tried to explain to Jack that the last bus back to Ridderkerk on a Saturday is at 11.10, but Jack, being a man, insisted I was wrong and it was as late as 12.15. So. We stayed at Coconuts for a few drinks once he had finished work (the reason for this being, Marcel is dating a girl off of Dutch Television, she was coming to Coconuts that night and Jack wanted to meet his first 'famous person' - which may I just add didn't happen as she was ridiculously late. To be honest, if this 'famous person' was Johnny Depp or something I could completely understand, but as it happens it was some Dutch girl who appears in a soap every now and again..) Anyway, as I knew we would, we missed the last bus home, having to catch a different bus and walking for half an hour, in the rain, at one '0' clock in the morning. As you can imagine. I was. not. happy.

Day Three (Yes, Sunday, thats right..)

This morning we just lazed around, got ready about midday and went off to Kim's house (Jacks sister) with his Ma and Auntie, ate tomato soup (with red peppers - random) went back to Jacks, played a few rounds of cards, watched 'Over the Hedge' and I got the bus back to Beukelsdijk.

Over all I had a very lovely weekend.

Feeling a bit sad and tearful..

For no apparent reason I have felt like I could burst into tears at any moment!!

I'm sure Ineke and Robbert must think i am a right wierdo!! After we had finished dinner i just didn't feel i could hold my tears anymore and literally grabbed my coat and ran into town!! To be honest it was incredibly rude of me i just felt far to embarrased to sit there and cry!! (especially as the whole family were over!) Anyway my theory was that if i went to visit Jack then i would feel a little better.. well this didn't work! just cried the whole time!! Jack was sure that there must be something wrong that i just wasn't telling him but seriously there really wasn't!! I just can't put my finger on what triggered it, i love my job, i don't feel home sick (i mean i do miss my friends and family but it wasn't particulaly bothering me today) and i just saw Jack this morning so i really have no clue!!

Anyway am feeling much better now and i am sure i will have made a full recovery by morning!!

P.s. this is a little like the other night, Jack called whilst i was sleeping, i missed his call and sat there and full-on balled my eyes out for about half an hour!! I am sure it must all be down to tiredness..

P.p.s..

My food diary..
Didn't take breakfast - was in too much of a hurry.
Lunch - Cheese, ham and pinapple tosti from Coconuts.
Dinner - A bean curry with meat and rice (lekker hoor!!)
NO SNACKS!! Very proud of that one..
Drinks - Chocomel with Lunch, Squash with dinner, a glass of water and half a (small) glass of Coke.

To be fair i think i did quite well today.

Tot Ziens!!

We had illegals next door!!

Basically, I looked out the window yesterday morning to see a woman laying on the ground outside next doors house. One would naturally presume she had either fallen, tripped or fainted. Until two police vans, an ambulance and a couple of fire engines turn up that is.

So I then come to the conclusion that maybe there was a fire in the house next door, therefor the woman having to jump out of her window. But I was also wrong on this.

Well, word of mouth tells me this is what happened..

This unfortunate woman jumped out of a top floor window along with four others after hearing a knock at the door and seeing two police vans outside. So this brings me to believe that infact they were all illegal immigants trying to escape the police force, this particular woman being a little unsuccessful and breaking her leg.

Never a dull moment.

My encounter with Kim!!

Well, as you may know Kim is my best Dutch friend.. here's the catch. I'd never met her until Saturday. We met on the Internet (yes, think what you like..) She lives near Eindhoven and traveled the one hour and fifty minutes to Rotterdam to see me. So we started off the day travelling from Centraal Station to Stadhuis by Metro (yes this is very significant as she has never been on one before (25 years she has been Dutch!!)) Well we went to Dudok for lunch (and yes I did have the overly-lushus Brie, Apple and Honey Ciabbata), had great fun analysing peoples' outrages dress sense, i know it is good to be unique but some people are just ridiculous and I struggle to understand how they can look in the mirror and think 'Wow! I look fantastic in this overly-hideous skirt, bright pink tights, green strippy top, elbow gloves and trainers!! Not to mention this fantastic belt i have on with spikes all around it!!'

We then went for a mooch around the shops, Kim continually amazed that they have Bodyguards, and that actually, Rotterdam is not as bad as it is said to be. We both did considerably well to control our spendings (to be fair, this wasn't so hard for me as i had a serious lack of money to start with and do not own a credit card.)

Once the shops began to close we made our way to Coconuts for a few drinks, subjecting Kim to Marcel the womanizer (there are better words i could use for him but my Mother may be reading) lets just say he has had more than his fair share.. anyway he took quite a liking to Kim, rather her than me!!

Anyway this bought an end to our day, so we walked to back to Centraal Station, coming across a large number of incredibly perculiar people along the way, and waved goodbye to Kim.

All in all i had a really lovely day and i think she did too?! However i think the best part of this was talking to Kim this morning and finding out that when she returned to Eindhoven the window had fallen out of her car so she had to drive the 40 minutes home with no window!! Amused me greatly.

Leila

So. Today i was babysitting. You know, this can actually be so much fun!!

So we started off by having some lunch (well, Leila did anyway. personally i wasn't prepared to eat 3 slices of ham and a chopped up cucumber.)

Then we proceeded to take a trek into town. Of course stopping of at the park for an incredibly long 'swing' before going 'Forward and Beyond' into the center. May i just add by this time it is about 1.45 and Leila normally takes her nap about 1ish.

So i take Leila out of her pram and we have a little walk together (all the old ladies cooing as she walks past them). So it starts to rain a little, me, being me have this fabulous idea to stop for coffee. And a biscuit. Well. I tell you. This has to be the most expensive coffee i have ever drunk in all my life!! £5.10 for a coffee and a few biscuits. That's 7 euros and 77 cent!! could of bought a whole tub of coffee and 3 packets of biscuits for that!!

Anyway! we then went to Austins toy store where Leila was overly fascinated with the train set, therefor spending the next 25 minutes there before returning home for a nap!!

So, apart from the highly over-priced coffee and the utterly annoying train set i had a rather fantastic day!!

Take a look at her!! i mean - who couldn't enjoy her company!! (OK - this photo is a little physically repulsive of me but just couldn't work out how to chop of my face!! she looks so cute!! i had to post it!)

UPDATE!!

Well, there are a couple of things that have happened over the last couple of days that i need to update you on!!

Firstly. Jack killed the bird.

Let me explain.. OK, Monique bought a bird at the weekend. A lovely little thing called YoYo. So all is hunky dory, until Jack gets home from college that is. So Jack very innocently gets the bird out of its cage, all is well.. for a few minutes anyway, when the bird starts hyperventilating, has a spasm and dies!! In Jacks hand!! Personally i found this all rather amusing. Sorry to all you bird lovers out there.

And Secondly. The Taxi man stole my flight.

Again, let me explain.. Basically, Giverney was kind enough to lend me £10 to pay for the remainder of my flight back to Holland (yes, i didn't even have a tenner) anyway so she gives me a £20 note for the taxi back home so i could keep the change for my plane ticket. OK. So I get in the taxi. Chat away to the driver (like you do) and we pull up to my house.

"That'll be £7.40 then please love"

So i hand him the £20 note. He's scrambling around in his pocket for the extra 60p so i say..

"oh just give me a couple of quid back, that'll be fine"

And that's that.

Its not until the next morning that i realise he literally did give me a couple of quid back!! Obviously I meant Plus the £10 note!!

So again, i am back to square one of having no money and no flight home.

So i call the taxi firm and explain what has happened. The bloke on the other end of the line tells me he will talk to 'Richard' and told me to call back the next day.

So i do. However this guy isnt there so I talk to another man who says he will get 'Chris' to call me.

It is now Tuesday. I have had no call from 'Chris' so i call them back. This time i'm lucky enough to speak to Chris, he explains that 'Richard' was only given one £20 note that night and cannot account for where it came from, so therefore i cannot have my change. What he fails to understand is that one £20 note was mine!!

So basically I paid £20 for a £7 taxi journey. And still no flight.

Sorry? Superheros? Pah!

Word of advice to all you physically or verbally violent people out there.. head to Newton Abbot.

Let me explain..

Me and Giverney were walking along the long road connecting Newton Abbot town centre and Rafters, minding our own business, a young woman passes us really quite distraught, crying. Followed by an outraged bloke shouting his mouth off (who quite happily yelled abuse at me and Giverney as we passed) Anyway, us being the good citizens that we are felt it would be wrong to leave this poor woman alone with this lunatic. So we walked back towards them in an attempt to rescue the Damsel in Distress. So obviously as we turned around to talk to her we got an earful from this delightful man (who very wrongly stated to me.. my manners are better than yours ever will be.. bit of a peculiar comment to make don't you think when you are in the middle of verbally abusing your girlfriend?) Anyway as this was going on, this woman getting more and more distressed a bloke who passed a while before called the police. So. This is where the so called 'superheros' are supposed to come in and save the day. Well. Lets rewind a bit. The police have driven passed!! Oh yes.. with there special blue lights flashing.. but of course.. no physical violence taken place as yet so why should they stop? Lets not be ridiculous and prevent something that could happen happening, lets just wait until there is something physical to stop. So the police turn around at the round about. Me and Giverney go and talk to them, but oh no, don't be silly!! they don't want statements!! they want our phone numbers and then drive off without another word. So I'm expecting to get a call from the police today. By which time it will be too late to help this poor woman as nobody knows either of there names or phone numbers (not particularly something i tend to ask someone likely to beat me to the ground.)

So yes. That was my story of my eventful evening last night. And just to prove how terribly the police handle situations of violence. You know the saying.. sticks and stones may brake my bones but names will never hurt me. Has to be the most ridiculous thing i have ever heard as verbal abuse is often far more hurtful than any physical abuse you can suffer. Maybe the police should consider this next time they are called out to handle a situation like this one.

p.s. sorry about the lack of photo.. also something i tend not to ask raving lunatics.

Who wears the trousers?!

OK. So i can handle being woken up at some ridiculous hour in the morning to catch a plane. Go on Holiday. Receive some exciting news. OR EVEN WORK. But certainly. not. this. I am up. i have wellies on (and for those of you who know me. This would never usually happen.) I have the lead in one hand. The poopa scoopa in the other (and for all you Dutchies out there.. yes we do have to pick up the poop in England.. hence why i moved to the Netherlands.) and I'm just about ready to go. So I'm thinking, OK this is a good opportunity to get some exercise in the mornings (yes i have to do this everyday for at least the next two weeks) Well what a stoopid idea that was! have you ever tried to walk a dog in the freezing cold, gale force winds or Newton Abbot? DOGS. DON'T. MOVE.

OK. So we make it to the woods.. as you can see it goes on for a rather long time. So I'm walking, with my little camera having a whale of a time.

But it all gets a little to much for poor old molly. She needs to have another little rest. Bless her.

And another.

Until finally, she decides actually. Ive had enough, were off home now Rachel. Who does she think she is!! Someone needs to teach her who wears the trousers in this relationship.